Aortic Dissection Surgery and Short Term Memory Loss

I have been meaning to write several posts about connective tissue issues but every time I sit down with my IPad I seem to have forgotten just what I was going to write about.

Aorta dissection surgery contributed to my short term memory loss

Well, I am going to try and get through this post without forgetting what I actually wanted to tell you.

This is really frustrating, a cry for help from me, mostly to myself.  It is important for me to find ways to cope with not being able to remember things.  For one thing, the dread of 'am I coming down with Alzheimer's Disease' lurks in the not so distant background each time I have an episode of 'I can't remember'.  That means I worry about Alzheimer's Disease many times a day and worry is not something I am supposed to be doing.  Worry causes stress which in turn contributes to hypertension which in turn is not good at all for my seriously weakened and dissected cardiovascular system or the pseudoaneurysm on my coronary artery.

Mostly I deal with my insecurities about the fragility of my heart, arteries, memory, stuttering and connective tissue problems with a blend of persistent but low impact physical therapy and humor.  Certainly it is more palatable for me to joke about my short comings than to deal with ugly defensiveness on my part.  But today I  thought a frank discussion and sharing of experiences coping with forgetfulness would be the best route for me to take.

Sharing with others about one's shortcomings opens up vulnerabilities but in a safe atmosphere can become a healing modality too.  So I am sharing with you today some of the things I can remember enough of about my forgetfulness issues to record here before they disappear into wherever lost memories go.

Ever since I had unexpectedly been subject to two open heart surgeries, one where my heart was on bypass for quite some time, my ascending aorta replaced and a mechanical heart valve installed, I have struggled with short term memory recall.

As a blogger I used to have excellent recall of words.  My mind was part of a walking thesaurus; me. Not anymore though.  Now I keep a tab open to the thesaurus wepage on the computer when writing.

So several times over the past few weeks I've had some seemingly great ideas for a cardiovascular or connective tissue or Marfan post only to arrive at the IMac empty minded.  Sheeez.  That was so frustrating.  I have much to say and share but I just cannot remember what it is I want to say much of the time.

The other day I was leaving a business and headed to the pharmacy to pick up a refill on some my medications.  Exiting the drive I could not figure out which way to turn.  Do I turn to the right? Maybe I turn to the left?  Arrrrgh!  This is happening more and more frequently to me.

Then this week on the way to drop my teen daughter off for her college class where she was having an exam, I became wrought with irritation when I could not get out my answer to her question about the topic she was being tested on.

I wanted to share three very important study points with her.  I had them laid out clearly in my mind but they would not come out of my mouth in the form of words.  As soon as I started to tell her the first then the other two would disappear.  So I stopped and rethought the three facts through again, and once more, as soon as I began to discuss with my daughter the information disappeared from my mental recall folder.

Well, I have been considering this issue and exactly how my brain may have been compromised somewhat with respect to 'embolistic events' as my neurologist calls them, during my surgeries.  I have decided a couple of important things, and they are;

• I need to stay active physically to keep good blow flow to my brain.
• Diet is extremely important.  I must do 'brain' foods!
• Plenty of rest is an important thing to add to my 'to do list'.
• Daily mental exercises are a must.
• Stress must be minimized (stop worrying about Alzheimer)
• Support group interaction and participation (sharing) is required.
• Creative solutions to improving short term memory are available for my use, and
• I need to focus and stay away from multi-tasking.

One creative solution I've come up with solves the 'which way do I turn?' dilemma.   Instead of asking myself 'which way do I turn?', I first tell myself where I am headed.  This peels back the layers of a more complex question, simplifying the decision making process from a 'which way do I turn to go where?' to a statement 'I am going to the ...'.  Once I am focused on my destination it is easier to decipher directions.

And I tried this method all this week and it works!

For me, creative solutions to short term memory issues lie within my ability to adapt!  Now, all I have to do is remember these creative solutions from day to day.

Aortic Dissection and Short Term Memory Loss - Mind Mapping Therapy!

What was I going to write about?

Aortic Dissection & Short Term Memory Loss, Mind MappingTherapy

Yes, short term memory problems haunt me like....uhhhh, I forgot.

Long term memory is sharp as ever.  Just ask me about my childhood!

However, short term memory problems are a writer and lawyer's curse!!!  I mean who wants to read an article where thought continuity is lacking.  And who especially wants a lawyer who can't remember what to say!!!

While the doctors had my heart on by-pass for eight or so hours and my entire body temperature lowered to thirty four degrees there were as the neurologist says embolistic events occurring.  I suspect this means small air bubbles making their way into my brain, or other stroke-like happenings, ischemic or otherwise.

The diagnosis is now 'cognitively challenged'.  Thank God I have Marfan Syndrome because according to the South African Marfan Syndrome Organization scientists, Marf's have above average IQ's.  So I will take that extra IQ and mitigate the short term memory loss, hopefully.

However short term memory loss (STML - hey, the brain is like a computer....) is extremely, extremely, extremely frustrating.  I am sick and tired of people blurting out 'well, I told you...", or 'don't you remember that....",  because no, no, no...I do not remember.

And it gets worse when I am under pressure.  Simple things, like ordering one of those very delicious Publix sub sandwiches that make your mouth water so much you have a hard time swallowing all the drool, makes me stutter and stand in front of the deli worker, speechless when she asks what I want to order.  I should have written the order down.  And it gets worse when she raises her strange looking emo eyebrows with anticipation of my answer while those drooling people standing in line behind me began fidgeting.

Drooling is one of my embolistic event results I struggle with anyway.  But my higher than average IQ has cued me in on ways to hide the quick wipe swipe and find a place to dry my hand without being noticed.

Or when I am on the phone with someone from Craigslist who is selling something that Judy and I know would be perfect for the Florida Urban Permaculture Garden and the seller says, "you know where this or that road is, right?"  Seems like the emphasis is always on 'right?'

No!  I don't remember!  And it is OK I don't remember. It is not my fault my brain doesn't work as smoothly as yours.  But I don't say any of these words.  Usually it is a slow smile that emerges, with the stomach ache inside.

So I try to do mental therapy, like writing, hopefully to help improve my STML.  But word recall is extremely difficult for me now.  Even with my memory challenges, I know that I don't know at least half of the words I used to be able to make appear through my fingertips on the computer screen, even before I knew what to type.

Today with my brain engaged in the non-normal path, the thesaurus is such a great help and my solution to mixing up the words, no pun intended.

But one of the most useful tools I have found in my search for my lost short term memory is something called 'mind-mapping'.  Though not new to the world, mind-mapping is a new concept for me, pulling reason out from the foggy swamp of murky word recall and thrusting idea organization into the world once more full of reason and light!  Ha!

I use MindNode on the IPad to help me organize everything from to do lists of complexity, outlines, journals and other jumbles of thoughts, ideas and words.  LifeHacker has a great post on their top five mind-mapping programs, that I found very informative and helpful.

Mind-mapping is really just a list of ideas put on paper or the computer in an organized fashion for recall at a later time.  The reason I like the IPad apps for mind-mapping is because they allow you to easily add to, adjust, change the order of or otherwise organize your ideas.  The outline for a book would be a perfect example of how mind-mapping could assist anyone, but certainly be of great value to the mentally challenged.

One important tip here.  Do not procrastinate.  Never tell yourself you'll add a great idea to the MindMap later.  Add the idea while the thought is fresh and alive.  How many times have I run to get a glass of water or do something really quick only to return to the MindMap just to forget what my great idea was.

I am disabled.  There is no other way around that acknowledgment.  My word recall sucks.  I slur my sentences from time to time, some days being worse than others.  Maybe it is the beta-blockers or the other med myriad pills or something biological in my brain.

But I'll take anything that can help me cope with the short term memory loss.

Mind-mapping is an awesome tool you should check out!